So Ginni is back in the US and I am teaching her CCD class of 4th graders. The lesson this week is about the beatitudes. The book we are using focuses on being happy, using the format of the beatitudes "Happy are the ... For they shall ..."
So, I ask the kids to write down three people they know who are happy - and why.
They all start writing away, except one. This is an 'active' boy who can't sit still, can't stop talking, and typically can't focus on the task at hand.
Eventually they get that first task done and I ask the next question, if you could have anything in the world that would make you happy what would you want? Again, they all start writing away, except one. As he acts up and distracts the others I'm getting a bit short on patience but finally they're all done and I have them read some of their ideas.
There are the obvious answers like, I wish I had a million dollars. Then there are the child-like ideas like, I wish I could fly. Then we get to the hyper-active trouble making kid. "I wish I wouldn't get beaten with the hot wire." Just like that - spoken with no excitement, no embarrasment, as if it was the most natural thing to be beaten with the hot wire and his wish was that he wouldn't get beat.
Coming from Boston, with all the child-abuse sensibilities filling me I begin wondering what child advocate group I need to call. When the class is over they all leave and I start setting up for the High School kids that come next. One of the volunteers that comes for that class is someone who is actually a teacher so I pull her aside and tell her about the hot wire. She shakes her head and looks at her feet and says, "You know Deacon, corporal punishment is allowed in the schools here. In fact its encouraged."
The public school teachers here are empowered to beat the children who act up. A paddle is something teachers have in the classroom. Clearly they don't use the hot wire, that's something he experiences at home. My volunteer told me that a few months ago a member of Parliament had written an editorial in one of the newspapers asking the question 'Should corporal punishment be eliminated in the schools?' He put forth his argument and for the next few days he was ripped up and down by just about everyone. 'Who do you think you are? Are you better than God? The bible says spare the rod and spoil the child - are you better than the bible?' It just went on and on for days and eventually he simply dropped the idea as being extremely unpopular.
I can recall during last year's CCD program I mentioned that the kids were difficult to control to a few parents and their immediate response was 'Well beat them, Deacon - if they don't behave beat them'.
Clearly we are not beating them - but equally clear is that beating the children who act up is part of the Bahamian culture. Eliminating the beating with a hot wire, however, is something I need to look into.
Till nex time.
Friday, November 20, 2009
Monday, November 16, 2009
Yet another murder
Saturday morning at 6:30 the phone rings. Its someone from our church in Cargill Creek telling me that one of my parishioners sons was shot last night in Nassau. He tells me she will be trying to catch a morning flight and it might be good if I could be there.
I wash up, throw on some clothes and head to the Andros Town airport. The airport in the early morning is a busy place. The terminal is one 30'x30' building with several small airlines and a few charters who seem to all schedule thier morning flight to Nassau from 7-7:30.
I know the family car and, scanning the parking lot I know they haven't reached here yet so I wait in the van, hoping to catch them before they go inside. Eventually they arrive and she is clearly overcome with grief. We hug a long time as her husband unloads the luggage. Her mother is also with them for the trip to Nassau.
I should explain that her son is from a prior relationship. He is not the son of her current marriage. As her husband unloads the luggage and she and I hug, amid wails of grief, people begin to come over and gradually word spreads throughout the airport. Everyone knows her, everyone knows her son, and the shock of his being shot gives way to compassion.
People help her into the terminal, her husband buys the tickets, her cries and tears fill the small building. I wipe her tears, and gradually am able to lead her outside for some privacy. She is unable to talk but I begin to calm her down a bit reminding her how God has worked in her life in the past, how He has been with her in tough times before, and how He will be with her through this as well. All the time she is nodding, agreeing, but the tears will not stop and all we can do is hold on another.
Her husband and mother join us and he asks the mother for her money so he can buy her ticket too. Its then she tells him she has no money. In the midst of all the caos his face fills with disbelief. He looks at his hands and knows there isn't enough money for 3 tickets, and helplessly he looks at me. I open my wallet and have $30 - the ticket is $50. In the crowd surrounding us is a man who also lost a son to a shooting in Nassau not 4 months ago. "What do you need?" he asks, seeing me with my wallet open and the look of despair on the husbands face, and a $20 bill is added to the kitty.
Back to the counter goes the husband to buy the 3rd ticket, and knowing we have time I start steering her to the church van so she can have some privacy while we wait for the plane. Half way to the van people come streaming out of the terminal calling us. Rather than having them wait for the flight we had tickets for, the airline gave the money to one of the charter flights whose plane was loaded and ready to go. The charter was holding the plane so they could get off as soon as possible.
Ten minutes later they are on the plane, the door closes, and the plane starts moving - literally before they reach their seats I think.
That night the details appear on the news. An altercation in a Nassau night spot - words are said, and its over - but then he returns with a gun.
In the year we have been here 4 men from Andros have been killed on Nassau. This young man came from a family that doesn't have much. He served as an altar boy and as a youngster he was bright and one of his teachers noticed. With some effort she was able to work with him and helped him win a scholarship to a college in the US. When he returned to the Bahamas, he started work and his future looked bright.
There are no words for the mother of this man. Her grief and pain are real and it will take her quite some time to deal with the loss of her son.
Please keep her in your prayers, and mention Ginni and I in those prayers as we will be ministering to her long after the funeral and burial.
I wash up, throw on some clothes and head to the Andros Town airport. The airport in the early morning is a busy place. The terminal is one 30'x30' building with several small airlines and a few charters who seem to all schedule thier morning flight to Nassau from 7-7:30.
I know the family car and, scanning the parking lot I know they haven't reached here yet so I wait in the van, hoping to catch them before they go inside. Eventually they arrive and she is clearly overcome with grief. We hug a long time as her husband unloads the luggage. Her mother is also with them for the trip to Nassau.
I should explain that her son is from a prior relationship. He is not the son of her current marriage. As her husband unloads the luggage and she and I hug, amid wails of grief, people begin to come over and gradually word spreads throughout the airport. Everyone knows her, everyone knows her son, and the shock of his being shot gives way to compassion.
People help her into the terminal, her husband buys the tickets, her cries and tears fill the small building. I wipe her tears, and gradually am able to lead her outside for some privacy. She is unable to talk but I begin to calm her down a bit reminding her how God has worked in her life in the past, how He has been with her in tough times before, and how He will be with her through this as well. All the time she is nodding, agreeing, but the tears will not stop and all we can do is hold on another.
Her husband and mother join us and he asks the mother for her money so he can buy her ticket too. Its then she tells him she has no money. In the midst of all the caos his face fills with disbelief. He looks at his hands and knows there isn't enough money for 3 tickets, and helplessly he looks at me. I open my wallet and have $30 - the ticket is $50. In the crowd surrounding us is a man who also lost a son to a shooting in Nassau not 4 months ago. "What do you need?" he asks, seeing me with my wallet open and the look of despair on the husbands face, and a $20 bill is added to the kitty.
Back to the counter goes the husband to buy the 3rd ticket, and knowing we have time I start steering her to the church van so she can have some privacy while we wait for the plane. Half way to the van people come streaming out of the terminal calling us. Rather than having them wait for the flight we had tickets for, the airline gave the money to one of the charter flights whose plane was loaded and ready to go. The charter was holding the plane so they could get off as soon as possible.
Ten minutes later they are on the plane, the door closes, and the plane starts moving - literally before they reach their seats I think.
That night the details appear on the news. An altercation in a Nassau night spot - words are said, and its over - but then he returns with a gun.
In the year we have been here 4 men from Andros have been killed on Nassau. This young man came from a family that doesn't have much. He served as an altar boy and as a youngster he was bright and one of his teachers noticed. With some effort she was able to work with him and helped him win a scholarship to a college in the US. When he returned to the Bahamas, he started work and his future looked bright.
There are no words for the mother of this man. Her grief and pain are real and it will take her quite some time to deal with the loss of her son.
Please keep her in your prayers, and mention Ginni and I in those prayers as we will be ministering to her long after the funeral and burial.
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